Dog Soldiers Review

Dog Soldiers

Genre: Horror

Summary (IMDB): A routine military exercise turns into a nightmare in the Scotland wilderness.

Dog Soldiers was initially released in 2002. It’s a brilliant werewolf movie that has surpassed its low budget background to become a horror classic.

As a big horror movie fan dog soldiers has been in my top 5 since the first time I watched it. It has everything you can want from a horror movie including werewolves, army squaddies, comedy and enough gore to keep even the die hard horror buffs happy

There are a lot of hilarious scenes to enjoy. The best one-liners come from the squaddies and their Sergeant (outstanding performance by Sean Pertwee) – I’ve included a couple of my favourite quotes below to give you an idea of how brilliant this movie is

“If we do happen to make contact, I expect nothing less than gratuitous violence from the lot of ya. Because we’re firing blanks doesn’t mean we have to be thinking nice thoughts. So you remember, you keep the fire down, right, you get stuck in and you kick their fucking teeth out, or I guarantee you, Joe, they will be eating your bollocks for breakfast, sunshine.”

“We are now up against live, hostile targets. So, if Little Red Riding Hood should show up with a bazooka and a bad attitude, I expect you to chin the bitch.”

Being an older movie Dog Soldiers hasn’t relied on CGI effects which means the werewolves were created using mostly special makeup and animatronics. I’m a big fan of the older special effects and the animatronics were effectively used in Dog Soldiers

To sum it up Dog Soldiers proves you don’t need a big budget to produce a great film.

NoisyGeek 5 out of 5

The Book of Prophecy Review

The Book of Prophecy

by Steven J. Guscott

Genre: Young Adult

Summary (Goodreads): No one in this quiet world knows what ignited the change; no one suspects that it all began with a secret book… Living among the innocent, in a society that has blossomed under seven centuries of tranquility, Dragatu expects to live out his days following the same path as his father before him, without even the smallest challenge to lift the monotony. But when he and his brothers are granted incredible mythical powers, every skill they possess is put to the test. Their actions will determine the fate of their people. What has been passed on in trust threatens to tear the brothers apart. Honour, love, power; all are at stake, and with them the only hope for a return to peace

***Spoilers***

Let me start by saying that i thought the overall plot was interesting, I haven’t read many books that focus on three brothers who each have different gifts which affect their appearance so it was an interesting concept.

I thought it was a shame that the book specifically focused on Dragatu, especially when he was such an intensely unlikable character. I would have preferred the story to be split over the three brothers and to learn more about them and their gifts. I hope this is covered in further books

I will admit i also felt a bit let down by the main female character Freta, she came across as a strong independent woman initially but after marrying Dragatu her entire personality seemed to change. She obeyed whatever Dragatu said despite knowing it wasn’t the right path for them.

I agree with the young adult rating, I think younger teens would enjoy this a lot more than I did. It’s an easy read which I think older teens/adults will struggle to enjoy.

NoisyGeek Rating: 3 out of 5

It Follows Review

IT Follows Review

Genre: Horror

Rating: 15

Summary: After a young girl gets involved in a sexual confrontation, she is followed by an unknown force.

***SPOILERS***

I’ve seen a lot of reviews calling this the scariest new horror movie which is baffling. For me a scary horror movie is one that makes me check under my bed and in the cupboards before I go to sleep but It Follows didn’t even make me double check the shadows.

It Follows is basically the story about a Demon/monster/curse that is passed on when a victim has sex with someone else – The Demon/Monster then follows its new victim before killing them brutally. It doesn’t run though, it meanders along after them.

It was a decent enough movie but it’s been way over hyped. The demon/monsters were relatively effective but I felt they lacked a little bit of scare power because you didn’t get the fast chasing part, all they did was walk towards the holder of the curse. I’ve heard arguments that knowing its constantly walking towards you is worse than being full on chased by it but i am completely unconvinced by that theory.

The trailer itself actually freaked me out more than the movie did. I hate when that happens

In terms of gore there isn’t much, you see a glimpse of a mutilated girl (which was quite impressive) at the start but most of the movie is suspense and jump scares rather than blood and guts.

It was pretty obvious how the plot would progress, the first guy she sleeps with to pass the curse on dies and she ends up with her childhood boyfriend at the end (still trying to keep ahead of the demon because of course they couldn’t kill it)

It genuinely felt like a b movie horror to me, I enjoyed discussing the choices the characters made and some of the demons were creepy but most of the time I was laughing – definitely not even close to the scariest movie I’ve seen recently.

You can check out the trailer here

NoisyGeek Rating: 3.5 out of 5

Jupiter Ascending Review

Jupiter Ascending

Genre: Science Fiction

Rating: 12A (UK)

***SPOILERS***

Summary: Jupiter Jones was born under a night sky, with signs predicting that she was destined for great things. Now grown, Jupiter dreams of the stars but wakes up to the cold reality of a job cleaning other people’s houses and an endless run of bad breaks. Only when Caine Wise, a genetically engineered ex-military hunter, arrives on Earth to track her down does Jupiter begin to glimpse the fate that has been waiting for her all along – her genetic signature marks her as next in line for an extraordinary inheritance that could alter the balance of the cosmos

Jupiter Ascending brings alternative planets as well as alternative “alien” lifestyles together with a refreshed take on reincarnation.

Although it’s called Jupiter’s Ascending it was Tatum’s character Caine (see above) who stole the show for me. Caine is a genetically spliced human who has wolf DNA embedded in his genes and is half-albino. A rough start in life led to him developing as a lone wolf which he struggles to overcome in order to save the main character Jupiter. Caine is definitely a massive attraction for Jupiter’s Ascending.

Tatum is his usual beefed up self with the added factor of beautiful tattoos and strangely sexy ears (see below). Caine is also heavily involved in most of the action scenes as well as the initially impressive gravity boot sequences. He’s a rough-side hero who uses the technology to his advantage

In comparison Kunis’ character Jupiter seemed to constantly need saving and fell short of the potential this story could bring to a heroine. Quotes like “The more you care, the more the world finds ways to hurt you for it,” showed the angsty clichés Jupiter’s character was laced with

Sean Bean’s character Stinger was another let down for me – Although he plays a part in the progress of the plot he was almost non existent after the initial few scenes (I did enjoy the initial ass kicking scene between Stinger and Caine though, who wouldnt enjoy that?)

There are a lot of CGI heavy scenes which are impressive at first however once you’ve seen one space or gravity boot scene the rest are old news.

It’s a shame more attention wasn’t paid to the plot rather than stuffing the movie with all the CGI. There were a number of scenes where I did actually thinking what the holy heck – I don’t want to tear the movie apart but the progress of the plot seemed thrown together with little thought to how it actually works. The ending felt like a cop out with questions left unanswered

Is Jupiter not bothered about the rest of the planets she ‘owns’? What happened to the other heirs?

Overall a semi-decent action movie if you like lots and lots of CGI, worth a watch for Caine but a lack of a decent heroine and general plot holes means it wont be making my To-Buy list

NoisyGeek Rating: 3 out of 5

Origin II #1 Review

Origin II #1 (1 of 5)

Writer: Kieron Gillen

Artist: Adam Kubert

Publisher: Marvel Comics

***SPOILERS***

Summary: A few years after the events of ORIGIN finds James Howlett running with the wolves…until something unexpected brings him back into the world of Follow the first “X-Man” as he finds his way back to civilization and falls afoul of someone Sinister, who’s just discovering mutantkind and the horrors he can visit on them. Plus, discover the secret behind James’ greatest enemy! At some point, the mutant who will become The Wolverine must choose: is he man or is he beast?

 “He had lived as man.

He had lived as wolf

As both, the Wolfish

Man found only woe”

 Issue 1 included a Collector’s Edition Acetate Cover which was pretty cool.

The entire artwork is stunning (as you would expect from Kubert). The forest scenes are drawn in a sparse but somehow still detailed way which fits the mood of the comic brilliantly. The fight scenes feature a lot red which hammers home the brutality of the wolf pack being killed but also the rage Wolverine felt after finding their bodies.

You can tell the quality of Kuberts work just by looking at Logan’s facial expressions – the range of emotions displayed really brought the story to life.

From a plot perspective this was quite a sad issue – It wasn’t hard to sympathise with Logan losing another family. Despite the sad storyline I really enjoyed this issue – I can’t wait to dig into the remaining 4.

NoisyGeek Rating: 5 out of 5

I bought the complete series from Reed Comics Online Store. They came securely packaged with backing boards and in their own separate envelopes. You can purchase the Origin II series at Reed Comics here or at your local store

Hercules (2014) Review

Hercules (2014)

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Action, Adventure

Summary: Having endured his legendary twelve labors, Hercules, the Greek demigod, has his life as a sword-for-hire tested when the King of Thrace and his daughter seek his aid in defeating a tyrannical warlord.

Hercules might not hold completely true to the legend but you do get some standard lore – The chain breaking and the slaying of the lion to name a few.

There are some impressive fight scenes and what has to be the biggest Hercules yet (Dwayne Johnson). A good supporting cast including Ian McShane and Rufus Sewell demonstrate the big budget pockets of this movie.

A decent movie for action fans

NoisyGeek Rating: 3.5 out of 5

Outlander (2008) Review

Outlander (2008)

Summary: During the reign of the Vikings, Kainan, a man from a far-off world, crash lands on Earth, bringing with him an alien predator known as the Moorwen. Though both man and monster are seeking revenge for violence committed against them, Kainan leads the alliance to kill the Moorwen by fusing his advanced technology with the Viking’s Iron Age weaponry.

Science fiction and Vikings have been perfectly blended together in Outlander. There’s monsters, spaceships, norse mythology and plenty of gore filled battle scenes. It delivers everything I love in one movie

If you haven’t watched this already I would definitely recommend watching it. There’s a nice romance backstory between the main characters Kainan and Freya as well as a budding bromance which is always nice to see in an action movie.

The one tiny niggle for Outlander was that some of the special effects, particularly the monster scenes which came across as a bit cheesy but it’s easy enough to forgive when you think this movie was made back in 2008

Well worth a watch

NoisyGeek Rating: 4.5 out of 5

Morganville Vampires Series by Rachel Caine

Morganville Vampires Series

By Rachel Caine

Summary: The Morganville Vampires is a series of young adult urban fantasy/vampire novels written by Rachel Caine

After my last review of Book One (Glass Houses – read it here) I mentioned that id heard the other books in the series were supposed to be far better than book one. Well I set aside 10 hours yesterdays to give them a try

I read through Books Two, Three, Four and Five and I have to admit they were better than Book One which wasn’t a high bar to beat granted. I’m surprised these books are so popular

There is a lot of slammed doors and teenage tension which gets a bit tedious. The main character has developed into a slightly more likeable person but there is still something off about these books. It could be the woe is me attitude of the main character or the way everything seems to just magically work itself out.

The covers weren’t all that great on any of the books – obviously designed to appeal to the gothic side which despite the books vampire theme didn’t seem to match the story

Another big annoyance for me was the cliffhangers on every book – It’s annoying when authors try and force you into reading the next book just to find out what happens.

NoisyGeek Rating: 2 out of 5

After reading five of these I won’t be taking the series further

Glass Houses by Rachel Caine Review

Glass Houses (The Morganville Vampires #1)

by Rachel Caine

***SPOILERS***

Summary (Goodreads): College freshman Claire Danvers has had enough of her nightmarish dorm situation. When Claire heads off-campus, the imposing old house where she finds a room may not be much better. Her new roommates don’t show many signs of life, but they’ll have Claire’s back when the town’s deepest secrets come crawling out, hungry for fresh blood. Will she be able to face the town’s terror or will she drown like everyone else?

This book had the beginnings of promise but it read like a rough draft.

I had some major issues with the general plot of the story – it was all cliché. The “ugly” intelligent girl, the goth girl in the vampire community, the handsome boy who happens to fall for the “ugly” intelligent girl, the rich popular bullies urgh just seriously?

There was a quote in the initial few pages which almost made me give up reading:

“And face it, being hot? That was what life was all about.”

The main character annoyed me all the way through the book to point where i was hoping they would kill her. She was supposed to like her flatmates but continuously put them in danger by being reckless. Who would put herself and her friends at risk going to school (labs filled with chemicals no less) after someone had shoved her down stairs and basically promised to kill her. An idiot obviously.

Another negative for me was the cover – A girl with purple hair and blood running down the side of her mouth. The vampires aren’t even the main characters in this book. At least make the cover one of the main characters or even the Glass House itself.

I’m sure you’ve guessed it but I won’t be recommending this to anyone. What a waste of a promising idea

NoisyGeek Rating: 0.5 out of 5 (ouch huh? sorry!)

Note – There is a web series based on this series which is better than the book.

Check it out here

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

***SPOILERS***

Summary (Goodreads): It’s the year 2044, and the real world is an ugly place.
Like most of humanity, Wade Watts escapes his grim surroundings by spending his waking hours jacked into the OASIS, a sprawling virtual utopia that lets you be anything you want to be, a place where you can live and play and fall in love on any of ten thousand planets.
And like most of humanity, Wade dreams of being the one to discover the ultimate lottery ticket that lies concealed within this virtual world. For somewhere inside this giant networked playground, OASIS creator James Halliday has hidden a series of fiendish puzzles that will yield massive fortune — and remarkable power — to whoever can unlock them.
For years, millions have struggled fruitlessly to attain this prize, knowing only that Halliday’s riddles are based in the pop culture he loved — that of the late twentieth century. And for years, millions have found in this quest another means of escape, retreating into happy, obsessive study of Halliday’s icons. Like many of his contemporaries, Wade is as comfortable debating the finer points of John Hughes’s oeuvre, playing Pac-Man, or reciting Devo lyrics as he is scrounging power to run his OASIS rig.
And then Wade stumbles upon the first puzzle…

 

This book was amazing – I’m so glad it came with last months lootcrate (you can check out my review of the Feb lootcrate here)

RP1 is filled with more geek that you can shake a joystick at and is jammed packed with so many 80’s references that I struggled to keep up in some places. I’m a few years shy of appreciating all the 80’s movie references but the gamer in me purred over the references to the older systems and games and I have a lot of the bands mentioned on my regular playlists. Who doesn’t like to rock out to some classic 80’s tunes?

What I loved most was that RP1 is not just a bit of nostalgia fluff – The plot keeps you guessing while being easy to follow and it’s no surprise this is a Geek favourite. The characters are easy to identify with and the ‘baddies’ are very easy to hate

Cline’s world building really sucked me in, I was practically salivating over the oasis hardware and the oasis game itself. I think I read the entire thing in 3 and a half hours, although it starts with a slow build the ending races up to meet you. I can’t believe that it’s taken me this long to read it.

It feels like i’m gushing again but i loved this book. Its secured a place on my Most Loved bookshelf

You don’t need to be an 80’s expert and I can’t think of any geek who wouldn’t enjoy this.

If you have already read RP1 let me know what you thought in the comments!

NoisyGeek Rating: 5 out of 5